Psychologist Dorothy Tennov coined the term limerence in the 1970s to describe a state of intense yearning for and infatuation with another person, an “uncontrollable, biologically determined, inherently irrational, instinct-like reaction”.

It doesn’t matter that the person may be unavailable, eminently unsuitable, or even completely uninterested. In fact, their disinterest may make the limerence stronger. Eventually, “the intrusions and literal aches of unfulfilled desire and precious wasted moments of life force the recognition that control may not be total… You wonder if you had the control you thought you had and whether you ever will again.”

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